How many of us make the mistake to rely on one person's opinion? How many of us has ever felt that crazy desire to go after someone who has all of the sudden stop talking to you, has change the way they behave around you, and if that was not enough, you started to question the worth of your well being?
And how about that feeling of trying to get somebody's approval that we are a good person? Yeah... I do know this feeling very well.
I have been going through some trials of my own on that. And my first temptation of action that came to mind was, to go the person who I am having issues with and try to get out that person's mouth to say that I am a good friend and that there's nothing wrong with me. And I felt like that if that person did not change her mind, her thoughts about me that will ruin my life because I won’t be able to move foward until that person tells me that I am a good person! Especially, if I don't know what the heck have I done wrong? And with all that going on in my head, Satan steps right in to say "the problem... is YOU!"
That was the last drop! I won't allowed my self to be bully like that! I was determinate to take measures into my own hands. I had to prove to whoever, that I was not the problem, because if I don't do that, I will go throught the rest of my life thinking "yes, satan is right, I am the problem". But then, another person came to my mind. How could I have forgotten about that person? I asked my self. Maybe, he is mad at me too! Oh boy! I need to call him and invite him over to come and talk to me before I do anything about that other person. And so I did.
At first, I was very scared of face him. However, I knew I had to.
In my thoughts, I called him “Jesus, are you there? Do you have time? Or are you mad at me too? Can you come and talk to me? And this picture popped out in my mind.
I told Him how I was feeling about the situation with the other person and how was I letting that bugging me. After I finish telling him everything that was in my heart, I started to feel him so close… and I in my mind I saw Him, touching my chin, making me look into his eyes, and as I did, I heard him asking me “why are you letting them put dots and stars on you?” ....Oh, boy! I knew at that very moment why He wants me to remember the story "you are special".
I felt ashamed… how could I forget that the most important opinion of all came from him, my Savior.
With that, I want to cry, but I fell asleep.
In the morning, when I woke, I was feeling pretty sad, thinking, that Jesus, was very disappointed at me. But as soon as I opened my eyes I start to hear this song in my mind by “The Pretenders”.
"Oh! Why you look so sad? The tears are in your eyes
Come on and come to me now.
Don't be ashamed to cry, let me see you through
Cause I've seen the dark side too
When the night falls on you, and you don't know what to do
Nothing you confess, could make me love you less
I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you
Wont let anybody hurt you, I'll stand by you
So, if you're mad, get mad! Don't hold it all inside
Come on and talk to me now
Hey, what you got to hide? I get angry too
Well, I am a lot like you
When you standing at the crossroads. don't know wich path to choose
Let me come along, cause even if you're wrong
I'll stand by you
Take me into your darkest hour, and I'll never desert you
And when the night falls on your babe, and you feeling all alone
You wont be on your own... I'll stand by you
And as that whole song played in my mind, I knew that he wants to make sure I would be alright and that I would know for sure how much he loves me.
I’ll try to always remember this>>> NO MORE DOTS AND STARS FOR ME! Because all I really need to care is that I am living in a way that pleases him. And as long I know that to be right, I will be happy.
I am not the only one he feels that way, is for every single one of us!